Once there was a stay-at-home mom  who used to accomplish all her household tasks with a pen, some paper, a telephone, and her trusty automobile.  Then one day her husband finally convinced her they needed a computer.  That her tasks could be accomplished more efficiently if they hooked up to this thing called “the World Wide Web”.  He used terms such as “internet shopping”, “emailing”, and “uploading”.  She reluctantly gave in and her life changed overnight.

Out the window went pushy cars salesmen, phone trees, travel agents, and waiting for pictures to come back from the pharmacy’s photo center.  Once there was even a little green van that would pull up to her door every week loaded with fresh groceries.  And with those groceries, thanks to recipe websites, she no longer had to rely on Aunt Bea’s tatertot casserole to feed her brood.  The computer became a lifeline.  She began uploading, emailing, downloading, scanning, zipping, decoding, editing, filing, formatting, and attaching.  She could even save all her Christmas addresses in a file at the ready. What had she done before this incredible discovery?!

Of course, little did she know that her computer had something called a memory.  And that memory was quickly filling up. As time went on, that trusty computer of hers became  a little lazy.  Instead of uploading a picture in the zippy way it used to, it seemed to contemplate that task.  Perhaps it had better things to do.  Instead of working for hours on end, sometimes it would take an untimely vacation in the middle of creating an invitation or a sacrament talk.  Some days it felt a little shy and wouldn’t show it’s face at all.

She  mourned a little, then her mourning turned to annoyance, and her patience with it waned.  She was far too busy and there was far too much to do to waste anymore time.  Out they went to buy a shiny new, more efficient, bigger-brained computer.  When they got home, that trusty old computer was relegated  to the shabby desk in the spare bedroom where it gathered dust and was only turned on when that Mom needed to transfer an old picture or when she needed to revise a past talk to reuse in a new ward.  The only time it was used on a regular basis was every December when she printed out her faithful Christmas address list.

Then, one chilly November day, her husband suggested they take that trusy old computer to her brother-in-law (who happens to know all there is to know about computers).  Perhaps he could give it a good memory cleaning and they could ressurrect it for the kids to use  again.

“OK.  Whatever.  Sounds good.  Just save the picture files.  There’s nothing else I need on there anymore.”  she said.

So while the family filled up on turkey and green bean casserole, that old computer visited the rehab resort and finally received a thorough memory cleaning and a good dusting.  At home it was placed in the workroom where it was quickly adopted by the boys and efficiently began playing Zoo Tycoon with gusto!

That same day, to that Mom’s joy, she found their Christmas card order waiting on the front porch. Eager to get the cards out because nobody had their new address and they wanted to receive cards this year, she set about addressing the envelopes.  Up to the trusty old computer to print out the address list she went, just as she did every year.

click

click

CLICK

CLICK!!!

WHERE was the list?  WHERE was that list that had been added to every year?  WHERE was Aunt Gladys’ address at the new nursing home?  WHERE were the addresses of their friends who were unlisted because they were;  in law enforcement, or played NFL football, or were just plain paranoid?  How was she ever going to find her friend who’d been married so many times?  What was her last name now?  HELP!

SHE HAD FORGOTTEN TO SAVE THE CHRISTMAS ADDRESS LIST!

So, the following week was spent googling, searching, phoning, Facebooking, and emailing in search of lost addresses.  In the meantime she had neglected her 4 year-old who had watched all the Christmas specials on the DVR at least 3 times, her laundry-strewn, dust-encased house, her 4 times a week gym attendance had dwindled to once that week, and even her church job.

What?!?  The December newsletter needs to be done by today???

But, as many good stories do, this one also has a happy ending.  She found all the addresses she could think of, wrote the obligatory family Christmas letter, signed each with a personal note, addressed and stuffed the envelopes, and found time to blog (necessity, no?).  She saw the error in her hastly ways and realized she took her trusty old computer for granted.  She now dusts it regularly and doesn’t allow anyone to overload it with unnecessary uploads, downloads, or silly tasks.  It will live out the rest of it’s life fulfilling the boys’  Tycooning and Pokemoning needs safely and comfortably in a sunny corner of the workroom.

Now, if I haven’t contacted you for your address, I’ve either found it online or have forgotten you altogether.  Email me if you’re not sure and would like to receive a card again this year.

w_vonsosen@yahoo.com

Happy Fact or Fiction Friday.

Good luck with your own cards this year.

And give your old computers a little love…